Coming off the pill
Yay congratulations mama!!! So you’ve decided to get off birth control and be free from this roller-coaster moodiness and the numerous side effects of birth control. While we commend your tremendous effort to get off birth control, just know, women on birth control are probably jealous of you. I personally know dozens of women that are so jealous right now, no kidding. You may wonder why the jealousy if they are tired of the birth control they should take it off. If only you knew 60% of women on birth control are not using it to prevent the birth of any cute little baby, yes that’s right. 60% of women are on birth control because their Doctor or “Doctor internet” told them it’s the only solution to their PMS, PCOS, PID, heavy painful periods with big clots, perimenopausal symptoms, menopause symptoms, severe acne and so much more. Yep, severe acne, whatever happens to Proactiv lol.
Now you understand why most women on birth control are not using it to prevent “the birth of a baby” but some other conditions mentioned earlier and they can’t get off birth control anytime soon. So let’s get back to you, you are ready to get off birth control and be free of synthetic hormones. Well mama, just so you know, you are not going to be free of hormones or the numerous side effects anytime soon. Oh wait, you thought you were done? My wig ripped off laughing at your funny ass. Nah! that hormone roller-coaster is not done with you yet, sis. But guess what, I’ve got the solution that will free you forever from its claws. Think of me as the fairy godmother- the wise woman magical powers. I’m that wise woman, the only wise woman lol. Jokes apart, they call me Yoni Queen.
First, how many times do you poop a day? Weird question, yeah I know you might be rolling your eyes right now, and kudos to you if you did not get grossed out because of an uncomfortable question. News flash lady, you need to pass out those excess estrogens daily! If you usually don’t go daily, make sure you do now that you are getting off birth control. Eat fruits and veggies that are nutritious, and drink up. Nope, not wine, silly- Water. Drink more water so you can pass out those excess estrogens. Seriously though, I was not kidding when I said don’t drink wine, wine is bad for you right now when you are trying to get off birth control.
So what else can you do? Detox, my lady! You need to detox right after you get off birth control. You need to detox those excess hormones and the impact of the pill on your body. The plus side to that is healthy glowing skin!!! You are going to glow so good, the highlight from your glow will blind your enemy. How can you detox? Is it all those green juice cleanse and activated charcoal for 10 days? Maybe you are saying “I hate greens, I hate cleansing and I hate what you are preaching now Yoni Queen”. No, I’m talking about delicious herbal detox, and I can help you with that.
Still confused or you are ready to get that amazing skin glow fast, book an appointment with me. Also, if you are jealous of this little lady that is about to come off the birth control, maybe you would love to get off the birth control too, or you just want to get rid of your moodiness and other side effects of birth control. You too can book an appointment with me. See you on the other side.